I Love The Rain!

JohnMichael Capaldi - Let It RainI love the rain

..and what it symbolizes. A fresh new day. A brand-new start. Everything is clean. Everything starts over and everything is ready to blossom. I love how everything on this planet is water-soluble.  Water carved the Grand Canyon , wears down mountains and nourishes the soil that grows our food. The latter imagery is so important. Water is where all life came from and our greatest blessing here on this planet. It’s everywhere in abundance.  It has it’s own natural never-ending cycle of purification and recirculation.

Think about the fact that we are still drinking the same water that the dinosaurs drank. We’re drinking the same water that cut through the Grand Canyon. We’re drinking the same water that has fallen as snow on the very top the Himalayas since the beginning of time. The same water we’re drinking floated down the Nile 5000 years ago. Water connects us to the entire history of the world, and it connects us to each other.

How magical is water when it falls as as single drop and collects as puddles, lakes, rivers and oceans?  Like human beings,  we walk alone but  gather in homes, cities, states, and countries –  Our bodies are made mostly of water. Water connects all of us here on earth. Water is the perfect element that physically and permanently connects us to one another.

Like human beings, water can also be destructive as in floods, ice, and avalanches.  One major difference between water and humans in this analogy of humans and water is this:  Water cannot choose where it collects and whether it becomes a constructive or destructive force, but we can.

I look forward all of your comments I sent all of you blessings have an amazing and wonderful day in the rain and in the sunshine of your life.

Love and blessings,

JohnMichael Capaldi

Compassion – For Us and Them

compassion-for-us-and-them-the-diy-lifestylerCompassion for others is a direct reflection of compassion we show ourselves.

Have you seen the truth behind a person’s smart-ass remarks?  Such remarks betray the attacker’s desire to look and feel superior.  To a very small degree, they are attempting to appear superior to the person(s) they are biting.  To a much larger degree, they are actually attempting to appear superior to their own perception of who they are.  Think about that for a minute..

There are and have always been people who aggressively attack others who have an opposing viewpoint.  Think about some of the ‘talking heads’ on television, for instance. Sadly, this behavior is one of the clearest indications of a person’s lack of compassion. These individuals may appear to be outwardly aggressive and abusive but what is going on inside of them is much, much worse.   They do not just beat themselves up – they genuinely dislike themselves.

I recently received a phone call from a close and personal friend.  She told me about a ‘talking head’ she had recently encountered and how this person was attacking and making generalizations about her personal belief system.  My friend told the ‘talking head’ that the leader of her belief system would be completely in disagreement and take offense with what he had said .   He was unrelenting and continued rhetoric.

My friend was so upset that she called me early in the morning to share what this man had said.  I told her to forgive him because he was not coming from a place of love, compassion and understanding. This is always the way of people who lack compassion.  They want to be right above all, and you must agree!  To people with this disposition, being right is far more important than being loved or loving themselves.

We are all delicate, beautiful, and gentle spirits. Everyone deserves a basic level of respect from others. It is time for us to give ourselves the compassion that we deserve. The forgiveness we deserve. There are those souls who will choose to fight and not learn and, even to the detriment of their own self-interests,  refuse to come from place of compassion and understanding.

I hope all of you choose and strive to be guardians of light and of love. I’ve learned that truth has it’s own perspective but that each one of us have our own opinions.  The most important thing we can do is to forgive ourselves, accept ourselves,  love ourselves,  and be gentle to our own spirit.  When we do these things we are no longer angry or insensitive,  but loving and understanding to ourselves and the needs of everyone around us – which makes a better world for all of us to live in.

I send you my love and compassion.

I look forward reading  your responses – thank you!

love,

JohnMichael Capaldi

Beating Ourselves Up?

johnmichael-capaldi-the-diy-lifestylerBeating Ourselves Up?

A lot of people continually judge themselves.  Some even seem obsessed with going around-and-around in circles with preconceived ideas about who and what they should or should not be, even who they are.  It’s obvious that these people love themselves but at the same time they treat themselves with the little or no respect.  This creates an internal process that destroys self-confidence. They may never have ‘enough’ –  be skinny enough,   tall enough,  good enough..  or they may have ‘too much’ –  be too tall, too short, too slow, too..  This mentality causes them to attack their perceived imperfections, which are truly character traits and attributes that make them unique and, most importantly, precisely who they are.

I’m surrounded by some of the most wonderful, magnificent, unique and beautiful people in the world.  All have incredible beauty inside and out but many feel the need to be constantly reminded of just how amazing they are.  A lot of this need comes from the way they were raised  and their relationships with parents. Our goal should be to overcome hindering elements of our upbringing so that we can become the best us that we can be.

I’m reminded of an adage of a small child who once said “God doesn’t make junk!” when I look at how amazing the people around me are, and the blessings that they each bring to the world.  I know some incredibly intelligent and magnificently beautiful people – people with the most beautiful spirits, hearts, and minds.  When I see them I am in awe of their magnificence.

The late Nelson Mandela wrote about how amazing we are.  He said that if we could see ourselves in the vision that God has of us and as others see us, we would be blown away at how much we are loved, respected, admired, and believed-in.

I have always felt that self-judgment is the original sin that separates us from God. When we judge ourselves or others we get in the way of all the beauty that comes our way.

I send love and blessings to all of you.

Please share your thoughts and comments – I look forward to reading them.

 

JohnMichael Capaldi

 

The Unconditional Love

the-dogs-and-I-johnmichael-capaldiThe Unconditional Love

Unconditional love is a tricky proposition. I have noticed that everyone’s definition of unconditional love comes with their perspective and their own judgment.  As a student of love I realize that unconditional love comes of our own personal convictions and the conditions in which we foster and live in. Many people I know use the example of their pets when they discuss unconditional love. I happen to agree. My relationship with my own two dogs is a pretty good representation of what unconditional love is.   I’m aware of this every time I pick up their poop off the ground with a plastic baggie-covered hand and tell them what good ‘girls’ they are.  I must  love them completely because I don’t know any boyfriend or girlfriend that would do that for their partner. Would you do that for your significant other?

My dogs give me love too. They cuddle with me, continually follow me around and constantly watch everything that I do.  Their love does, however,  come at a cost. I have to feed them, take care of them, wash them, and give them attention – and I love doing that for them.  I don’t mind having to pick up after them or cleanup their messes because I love the fact that I have two little companions who are always with me.

So I want all of you to think about this – look at your parents, your siblings, your children, your friends, and see which one of those you would clean up after.  I bring this up because  over the years I’ve had to do a number of things for the people that I love. When you’ve had to change diapers for a parent , a niece,  or a nephew – when you’ve had to take money that you were going to spend on food and spend it on the care of someone that you love – When you cancel all of your plans, changed and rescheduled your life to help someone that you love, you are the architect of some of the most selfless, amazing and wonderful symbols of unconditional love.

As you consider this, look squarely into the mirror and realize the importance of giving everyone around you the same honestly the love that you express for yourself. The conditions with which we give to others and the love that we share with others is an exact mirror of the love we have for ourselves. Think about how much you love yourself and how much that love is shared by the people around you.

I recently had a situation where I asked members my own family and friends for assistance with a situation.  I didn’t get mad at them for their lack of response or inability to assist me even though some appeared to have the time and the means to help.  I am sad for them because I realize that they don’t love themselves enough to share or do for themselves, to share with others, or to be the people they want to be because they can’t find love for themselves. I have a great deal of sadness for people who don’t love themselves unconditionally.  The core ingredients of unconditional love is our love for ourselves and how it is expressed in our love for others. I truly hurt and feel the pain for those who aren’t able to love, express love and be loved. Those who only understand faults love what they think they’re giving.

Think about how deeply you love yourself. Remember not to judge yourself but go deep within yourself and realize that the more you love yourself the more you’re capable of loving others. The greatest joy we have is bringing joy and love to others because it mirrors our love for ourselves.

Thank you and please share your thoughts and comments.  I’m looking forward to the conversation .

I love you – God bless you.

Love,

JohnMichael Capaldi

Friendship: The Family We Always Wanted!

the-diy-lifesyler-johnmichael-capaldiFriendship: The Family We Always Wanted!

In my life and in my adventures I have created a montage of wonderful friends.  People from every walk of life, every facet, and interesting lifestyle there is. I believe my friends cover every religion, every political view, every color, every lifestyle, and everything else in between.  I can say without a doubt that I love every single one of them and I am convinced that they love me too.

My friends and I have had some really great experiences together and I feel blessed every single day as I reflect on their being in my life. Every time I make a new friendship and add someone to the chorus of beautiful voices that are in my life I’m reminded of just how blessed I am. I think back to my oldest friends, people I’ve known since I was two or three years old that I are still in my life.  So many years we’ve shared together.  It’s remarkable that so many wonderfully amazing and beautiful people have been a part of it. There are members in my family that I am very close to and I maintain close friendships with some of my cousins but I have this amazing group of wonderful people that have entered my life and shared so much which continually makes me so happy. These people have become family to me.

As I mentioned in my last blog, we are all continually working out our life’s issues through our relationships: Our friendships,  our romances (etc.) are mirrors and each one of our friends reflect some aspect(s) of ourselves back at us, be it something we should work on  in ourselves or something we can draw a complement from, we should contemplate these insights into our own psychology.

I try to give all of my friends one-on-one time.  For one thing, it’s important to give your friends dedicated, undivided attention when you can.  An additional benefit of this is that it gives both of you an opportunity to see in each other things about yourself .  You should, on occasion, ask yourself things like:  What am I doing in this relationship? How am I expressing myself to this person? How am I relating to them? What is it that we are working on at a spiritual and emotional level become better people together?

I find the relationships that last the longest and are the most fulfilling are the ones that we share in.  When balance is kept and natural give-and-take order of healthy relationships is maintained it is easier to find our own reflection in each other. There are friendships that don’t last and I do the exact same thing.  I ask, ” why did that person coming in my life and for such a short period of time?”.  I will say some of my shortest relationships have taught me some great and dramatic information about myself.  What is most important is that I use this information to make me a better man.  In this way I see every single relationship as an opportunity to explore myself in truth, identify any issues and apply change to become the best man I can be.  I’ve made so many mistakes in my life like every other human being. What is important to me as that I do everything that I can to be the best man I can be and learn from my mistakes.

I feel so blessed, so satisfied to have been able to explore who I am through those around me.  We are, after all,  explorers in this world, exploring who we are through each other,  through our experiences, in our adventures, and we are all working to become better people in this world so that when we return to be with God we are the best that we can be.

We’ve all gone through hardships. We have all had to make decisions based on who we are,  what we’re able to do and what we’ve been able to accomplish. So I send you off with blessings, my friends. My new friends, my old friends and my future friends.  As you all share my life (and I yours) I send out hugs and blessings.  I look forward to seeing all of you very soon!

God bless you.

JohnMichael Capaldi

 

Our Example of What Love Is!

JohnMichael-capaldi-guitarOur example of what love is!

Most everyone knows the common-sense of it;  we usually fall in love with someone like our parents. Boys usually find love with women like their mothers and girls usually fall in love with men like their fathers. Of course that’s not the end of it because the relationship that our parents had, no matter what the relationship was, is the relationship that we are replaying in our own lives. Our friendships are also very much like the relationships we have with our brothers and sisters because we are reliving those kind of relationships as well. The one thing that can stop us from re-running the old negative (and positive) aspects of our parents relationships is therapy,  where we learn to accept and love ourselves. I know my parents had their ups and downs, but they were married for almost 51 years.

As I continue talking about seeking out and finding real love I encourage you to take a good look at the relationships that exist around you right now. The relationship you’re in and those that you are seeking to engage.  As you consider each relationship, ask yourself if each person represent san aspect of your parental relationship that you’re trying to fix or repair.  

Sometimes it can be a platonic relationship and not a romantic relationship (like a roommate) that you are in the process of attempting to make right.  

Don’t look only at the negative things you might be trying to fix in your relationships, look also at the positive things coming from the relationship. Listen to the arguments and situations that you’re allowing yourself to be put into. Are you playing and rewinding situations that have happened to you in the past?  Do your best to be honest.  You must be truthful because that is where the healing begins and the repair of the relationship begins.

Consider how you are nurturing in your relationships.  If you are in a relationship with someone like one of your parents, there is a strong possibility that you are acting like the other parent.  Don’t take this in a disheartened way or allow to bother you. Now that you recognize the situation you have a tool to use and a level of understanding to help you fix the issues.  Perhaps you don’t have to understand what it is or why you are with this person but by learning how to deal with the nuances you are able to see as an outsider, as a child in the relationship now.

Let this give you hope as you now have the ability to see and understand without bias as you did when you were a child and saw more clearly than the two of them.  Now you can understand, fix and be part of the solution. You can heal the relationship between the two of you.

I send you blessings. 

Yours truly ,

JohnMichael Capaldi

 

P.S.  Please share your thoughts and insight.

 

What Nobody Knows About Manifesting True Love!!!

paint-brushed-drawing-shape-of-a-heart-in-red-paintWhile we are still on St. Valentine’s Day weekend, I would like to talk about finding love.  I recently sat with the client of mine and we spoke about the kind of man she would like to be in a relationship with.  She told me that she’s written many, many lists on on the kind of man she wants.  I told her that we too would be doing such a list along with another list that not many people think about. The most important thing that you should know is what are willing to do for love! What is full-force for you and everything that you are willing to do to make this happen?

So many people write that they want to tall man, a woman with beautiful green eyes,  someone with broad shoulders,  someone who has money, or other things that you want this person to have.  Put it to the universe to create the perfect person for you but what you are willing to do to create and maintain the best relationship for yourself is really important.  What are you willing to do for relationship?

There are a number of things to consider. Are you willing to take time out of your busy schedule to making time to be together?  In the case of the woman I was recently talking to, at issue was cooking for the man she wants.  It’s apparently something that he really likes but was she willing to commit to doing that for him? You have to make concessions for the person that’s going to be perfect in your life. If you don’t make those concessions someone else will and you’ll be standing on the sideline wondering why you don’t have this perfect person in your life.

It takes two to tango.. It takes two to dance..  It takes two to make love..  It takes two to do the work to be in a relationship and make it happen.

Again I ask you, what are you willing to do? If you want pointers and you really want to make this happen, give me a call and I’ll help you formulate and create the perfect way to manifest the relationship you want.  That is, of course,  if you’re willing to have and you’re willing to work for it.  I will to go touch on this list again in the near future,  but you know how this works..

Yours truly with lots of blessings,

JohnMichael Capaldi

 

The Best St. Valentine’s Day

be-my-valentine-johnmichael-capaldiIn my life, my best St. Valentine’s Days have been the ones I have spent with my friends sharing our love for each other and our mutual respect. Over the years I’ve had many romantic , beautiful,  passionate, intimate relationships but  my best, longest lasting have always been my relationships with my friends. In a way, my friends are my loves of my life.In a way, when I choose a friend I’m much more picky than I am when it comes to choosing a romantic partner. I have even had one or two friends go from being friends to romantic partners and then back to friends, but back to Valentine’s Day..

As you may know, St. Valentine was a Roman priest (you can read more about him here).  I find that the modern culture of romance with regards to St. Valentine’s Day has at least a couple of camps:  Those who are desperate to have a lover in our arms gently caressing them and telling them how much they are loved and those who are just thrilled to share dinner and a movie, a box of chocolate or a dozen  red roses. To me the abundance of love in my friendships, truly all of my relationships, is far deeper and longer lasting than a date in the middle of February.

So to all the my great loves, my  great friends and all the wonderful people  in my life, please, be my valentine.  I love you all. 

I send you great blessings and I look forward to talking to you more about love the next few weeks. I’ll be writing almost exclusively on the subject.

Yours truly,

JohnMichael Capaldi

Please share your thoughts, comments, experiences in comment on my blog!

 

 

 

Smalltalk

small-talk-conversationThe art of Smalltalk seems to be magic bullet and the panacea to popularity in any situation. I have friends who are absolute master artists in the art of smalltalk.  It’s funny because I am not someone who is able to engage in Smalltalk for any length of time. As a matter fact it, it bores me and I usually have to fake a Smalltalk conversation.

My favorite conversations are the discussions about the journey of life, death and love. I enjoy talking about just about anything,  so long as it’s deep, real and honest. Truly, I can talk about pretty much any topic so long as everyone in the conversation is open to honesty, reality and truth.

I have noticed that those of my friends who are excellent small talkers won’t engage in Smalltalk with me but always come to me for real honest deep conversations. I think that’s why they’re my friends. When the only friends you have are people who have Smalltalk or insignificant conversations about the mundane, consider the probability that all involved are living the illusion of friendship.

 I always feel empty having a shallow conversation with somebody. I understand that sometimes Smalltalk is important.  In this life we must to have relationships of all different types. There are those deep relationships were all you do is discuss philosophy, theology and everything in the universe. There are those relationships where you only discuss politics or religion or sex. There are those relationships where you disagree about everything but still love each other (oddly, these are some of my favorites).  There are those relationships that are all fun and very much acquaintance that may develop into something serious, or not.  They are all something, so I’ll continue to try my hand at Smalltalk as it seems to be the opening volley into all of these… but I love when Smalltalk ends and the real thing opens up.  Then I can see the depth and breath of a person’s soul.  I want  someone who loves me and whom I love.

I send all of you my best and best wishes and I look forward to talking to you very soon please contact me with any questions have an amazing day.

Placing Intentions

First, you should  say a prayer thanking God for everything you want and everything you have. Thank God also for your ambition. Place a piece of paper in front of you with the intention you want clearly written on it.   Light yourself a candle and say a prayer thanking God for everything about to happen, reminding yourself and confessing to God that you know that He can do anything and that you can nothing without his support.  Thank him one more time that the two if you are working together for the goal . Allow yourself to meditate on the goal and what it is to see the path open up in front of you.

Something I like to do is place the intention in my head using some kind of sound. I’ll ring a bell, sound a gong or make some other sound.  This fixes the intention and places it energetically around you.  You can use a song, a snapping, a clapping, a ringing.  Maybe a strike on a piano key or the strum of a guitar. Whatever sound it is that works for you will help to remove any  blockages which may possibly interfere with whatever you are focused on accomplishing.

I finish this process by clearly thanking God for everything that is in my life   Every situation, every part of life is truly a gift.